The doors to a Center City bank swung open yesterday morning, and in shuffled trouble.
It's likely that at first, no one was intimidated by the presence of the man with the hunched shoulders, flat-brimmed baseball cap and large, dark sunglasses.
But within seconds, the awful truth was apparent inside the Citizens Bank at 20th and Market streets: They were in the presence of the rarest of criminals - an elderly bandit.
The thief, a white man who FBI officials said is "in his 60s, maybe 70s," struck at 9:34 a.m., when he handed a pillowcase to a bank teller and demanded cash.
The teller complied. FBI officials said the bandit fled on foot, and soon sported the fruits of his labor across his brown shirt - stains from an exploding dye pack that was hidden inside his stolen loot.
Surveillance images were released also showing the thin, 5-foot-11 crook - who wore khaki pants and brown, Timberland-style boots - as he entered the bank and then collected his pillowcase full of cash.
"Clearly, this was unusual," said an FBI spokesman, Special Agent J.J. Klaver. "He was on the older side of what we usually see."
Since 2006, the FBI has arrested just one bank robber who was in his 60s or 70s.
Typically, FBI agents are hunting for thieves who are in their 30s, Klaver noted.
Unfortunately, Cheeze was placed under arrest last night by two officers in West Virginia. While the specifics remain unclear, this amateur video captured proceedings. I hope he is able to post bail.
"Julian Beever is an English artist who is famous for his art on the pavements of England, France, Germany, USA, Australia and Belgium. Its peculiarity? Beever gives his drawings an anamorphosis view, his images are drawn in such a way which gives them three dimensionality when viewing from the correct angle."
This guy truly is ridiculous. Have a butcher's at some of the cooler ones below.
Despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary, this blog will be written under the impression that the reader enjoys good music, good film, good sports, and just about everything else we deem awesome.
Lemmings
About the Authors
Pursuant to the provisions of Virginia’s Megan’s Law, Cheeze must inform you and yours that he has recently moved into the neighborhood. He prefers his prophylactics to be cut extra slim and his wizard's magical powers to be plentiful. Favorite albums include Matchbox 20’s award-winning debut, “Yourself or Someone Like You” and Baha Men's smash hit "Who Let the Dogs Out?"
B Harris is most definitely his parents' son. He gets those dashing good looks from his father, who, as one would naturally assume, hails from Easter Island. His mother, God bless her, took it upon herself to raise him to be the daughter she never had, which is evidenced by his general demeanor. Malcolm and Roberta are the main reasons B Harris has become the (wo)man he is today. On a side note, the rash has temporarily gone into remission. The Doc said, and I quote "don't hold your awful breath."